Tragically, His Arms Would Be Too Short for the Lute
Order of the Stick comic
Comic no. 693
Date published 10 December 2009
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The party finds and activates an illusion planted by Girard Draketooth.

Cast Edit

Transcript Edit

Panel 1

Blackwing and Vaarsuvius are using Arcane Sight
Blackwing: So...when are you going to tell Roy what I saw in the rift?
Vaarsuvius: At some point after he becomes more accustomed to seeing you on my—
Vaarsuvius: Wait! Do you see that?
Blackwing: Yeah, I do.

Panel 2

Vaarsuvius spots a tetrahedron floating next to Roy.
Vaarsuvius: Sir Greenhilt! Please remain stationary at this time! Has either Master Thundershield or the bard cast any spells near your location?
Roy: You mean on the area itself? No, not that I'm aware of.
Vaarsuvius: Then I believe I have located something of importance via Arcane Sight.

Panel 3

Vaarsuvius: There is an inactive spell 1.1 meters in front of you, 0.8 meters in elevation.
Roy: "Inactive"?
Vaarsuvius: It waits to be triggered by predetermined events, possibly verbal in nature.

Panel 4

Roy: So, it's not currently hiding an entrance?
Vaarsuvius: I do not believe so, no.
Roy: could BE the entrance.
Elan: Ooo! Like a spell that teleports you to the dungeon when you say the password.
Roy: Yeah.

Panel 5

Elan: Or maybe the dungeon is really tiny, and the spell shrinks you down so you can fit inside!
Haley: Since we know this rift is larger than Soon's was, that's pretty unlikely, honey.
Haley: Also, if we went right into a full-blown "Alice in Wonderland" parody so soon after the sandworm thing, I think we'd all quit.

Panel 6

Elan: Or maybe only dinosaurs can see the dungeon, and the spell turns us all into—
Roy: Damn it, Elan, I just got all my old brain cells back! Please stop killing them!

Panel 7

Vaarsuvius: Those ideas are theoretically possible, if, for example, the cosmos hates us.
Vaarsuvius: (A premise I am not ready to dismiss, given our adventures thus far.)
Vaarsuvius: However, it does seem as if the spell is of the Illusion school, rather than those of either Transmutation or Conjuration.

Panel 8

Roy: Illusion? Well that certainly seems to point toward Girard... and these are pretty much the exact center of the coordinates Soon handed down to the Sapphire Guard.
Vaarsuvius: Which leaves the question of whether it is better to trigger the spell or not trigger the—
The tetrahedron begins to glow.
Haley: Uh, guys...

Panel 9

Haley (off-panel): I think that question is being answered for us!
Illusory Tetrahedron: Keywords accepted: Gate, Girard, Sapphire Guard, Soon.

Panel 10

An illusory image of Girard appears.
Girard: Hello, My name is Girard Draketooth.
Elan sadly pulls a piece of paper from his pocket.

Panel 11

The paper contains a drawing of a dinosaur wearing a cloak, sash, and chain shirt, titled 'ELANASAURUS REX'.
Elan: *Sigh*
Elan: Maybe next time.

D&D Context Edit

  • Arcane Sight is a 3rd level spell which allows the caster to sense magical auras.

External Links Edit

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