|“Tomorrow's Technology Today”|
|Order of the Stick comic|
|Date published||7 January 2005|
|View the comic|
Durkon goes shopping at Fine Gnomish Armor.
- Panel 1
Durkon walks into "Fine Gnomish Armor".
- Panel 2
Gnome: Hello! Hello, good sir!
Gnome: Looking for some armor? Of course you are, of course!
- Panel 3
Durkon: Me armor be good a' tha protectin', na so much at the bein' quiet.
Gnome: Ah, a common problem with the heavier armors.
- Panel 4
Gnome: Lucky for you, I have been experimenting with some ideas to quiet down any armor. How about we try a few of them?
- Panel 5
Gnome: This is my first idea. We surround the armor and wearer with a thick airtight plastic shell. Guaranteed 100% soundproof.
- Panel 6
Gnome: What do you think?
Durkon: Gnome: What?
Durkon: Gnome: What?
Durkon is turning blue.
- Panel 7
Gnome: OK, well how about this then; the armor comes equipped with a box of specially-trained hornets.
- Panel 8
Gnome: On command, they swarm out and puncture the eardrums of everyone within sight.
The hornets swarm out of an opening in the breastplate, "buzzzz!"
- Panel 9
Durkon: Isn't that a wee bit harsh?
Gnome: Well, it's like my father always used to say; You can't make an omelet without permanently deafening someone.
- Panel 10
Gnome: OK, then, try this: The Muskrat 3000. It consists of the suit of armor and a half-blind muskrat with 17 cymbals strapped to it.
- Panel 11
Durkon: How does THA make me any quiet'r??
Gnome: It doesn't. But if you release the muskrat ahead of you into the dungeon, it makes so much racket that the monsters ignore you.
The Muskrat 3000 makes a racket on the floor, "clang! clang! clang! clang! clang!"
- Panel 12
Gnome: The up side is, it doubles as a trap detection system. The down side involves druids with pointy sticks.
Muskrat 3000: What? It beats working retail.
D&D Context Edit
- A suit of armor's Armor Check Penalty (-6 for Durkon's Full Plate armor), along with Dexterity, modifies any attempt to Move Silently.
- The Gnome is paraphrasing the proverb "You can't make an omelet without breaking some eggs".
- Durkon first runs into trouble with the noise his armor makes in #24, Do You Hear What I Hear?. In the next comic Elan looks at the tag on the armor which shows that Durkon wears Full Plate Armor.
- This is the only appearance of the Muskrat 3000.