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The Lawyers Strike Back

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The Lawyers Strike Back
Order of the Stick comic
Comic no. 268
Date published 16 January 2006
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"The Cat Behind the Throne" "A Familiar Face"
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The lawyers for the prosecution and the defense are both familiar faces.

Contents

[edit] Cast

Roy, Elan, Haley, Hinjo, Lord Shojo, Mr. Scruffy, The Lawyers, Celia

[edit] Transcript

Panel 1

Hinjo: The trial shall commence shortly, once the last members of the court arrive.
Roy: "Last members..."?

Panel 2

Mr. Jones: Mr. Jones and associate for the prosecution, Your Honor.
Roy: Ah. Of course, the lawyers. I should have recognized their foul stench when we were brought inside.
Elan': Oh good, I thought that smell was Durkon again, Pew!!

Panel 3

Mr. Rodriguez: Hey, how come your name gets to be first?
Mr. Jones: Alphabetical order.
Mr. Rodriguez: ...
Mr. Rodriguez: Shouldn't it be "Associate and Mr. Jones", then?

Panel 4

Elan: Hey! Your side gets BOTH lawyers! Shouldn't we get one of them?
Elan: Or at least PART of one of them?
Haley: Qddd, baxww.

Panel 5

Hinjo: I'm sorry, but we contacted Mr. Jones and Mr. Rodriguez shortly after Miko was dispatched.
Hinjo: They're the best lawyers around.
Roy: They're the ONLY lawyers around!

Panel 6

Lord Shojo: Mr. Scruffy thought you boys weren't going to make it.
Mr. Jones: You can assure your feline that your court date was never in real jeopardy.
Mr. Rodriguez: Ohmygod!!! You have a kitty!!!

Panel 7

Vaarsuvius: This is a troubling development. I was already concerned about our actual ability to eloquently present our defense before this court of law...

Panel 8

Vaarsuvius: But now we must defed ourselves against two highly-skilled legal professionals--
Mr. Rodriguez: Kitty kitty! Hello, kitty kitty! Hello!
Vaarsuvius: --ONE highly-skilled legal professional and one man in a very expensive suit.

Panel 9

Hinjo: Now hold on, give Lord Shojo some credit. When we contacted Mr. Jones, our clerics also sent out a multiplanar call for a defense counsel.
Hinjo: We really didn't get much response at first, but eventually we managed to find someone.

Panel 10

Hinjo: Now, she's not technically a "lawyer" yet, but she is going back to night school part-time to get her degree.
Roy: Oh, fantastic!

Panel 11

Roy: This trial can't get any worse! The judge is insane, the jury is merciless, the prosecution in cutthroat, and now, our defense is a wet-behind-the-ears law student.

Panel 12

Roy: Our lives are on the line, and we're going to be represented by a friggin' paralegal!
Celia: Friggin' paraelemental, actually.

[edit] Trivia

  • The title is a reference to the Star Wars movie Return of the Jedi; Roy's line in panel 2 is a reference to Princess Leia's line to Grand Moff Tarkin in A New Hope.
  • Haley's line translates as:
    • Panel 4: Ewww, gross.

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