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The Lawyers

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Lawyers

Mr. Jones (left) and Mr. Phil Rodriguez (right)

Jones
Mr. Jones
Biographical information
First Comic

32

Last Comic

806

Physical description
Species

Human

Gender

Male

Hair color

Bald

Chronological and political information
Affiliation

Phil Rodriguez

Alignment

Lawful Neutral[1]

Status

Living

Phil
Phil Rodriguez
Biographical information
First Comic

32

Last Comic

806 (in person)
998 (flashback)

Physical description
Species

Human

Gender

Male

Hair color

Black

Chronological and political information
Affiliation

Mr. Jones

Status

Living

Mr. Jones and Mr. Phil Rodriguez are two lawyers that appear in the world of the Order of the Stick. They have litigated before the bar as both prosecution and defense attorneys and also ensure that no copyright infringements occur. Mr. Jon

es is highly professional and educated, though arrogant, while Mr. Rodriguez has a relatively childish demeanor, prefers to role-play when around the adventurers, and is prone to odd tricks such as producing a giant boot as a distraction. Mr. Rodriguez once claimed that they were sent by the "Spooooky Wizard who lives by the Coast."

BiographyEdit

Pre-OrderEdit

The lawyers prosecuted a number of high profile cases, as noted in their legal history below. Mr. Jones also served as Tarquin's attorney in his divorce from Elan's Mother.[2]

Dungeon Crawlin' FoolsEdit

The lawyers first appeared to enforce copyrights on the "Squid Thingy" as infringing on Wizards of the Coast's Mind Flayer,[3] and again against Zz'dtri for infringing on R.A. Salvatore's Drizzt Do'Urden.[4]

No Cure for the Paladin BluesEdit

They were seen threatening the bandit clan leader with a restraining order after being captured for being "universally despised".

At the Weary Travelers Inn and Tavern, Mr. Jones appeared to serve a cease and desist letter at Belkar's request,[5] claiming that Miko's use of Detect Evil "clearly constitutes an illegal search" employing "harmful radiation" (on the basis that many of the creatures Miko has scanned are currently dead, and that the scan is blocked by a lead sheet in a manner consistent with the properties of ionizing radiation). Miko's horse Windstriker then attempted to hire Mr. Rodriguez to put a restraining order on Belkar,[6] but Belkar simply informed Mr. Rodriguez that he was of Chaotic alignment and chased him out of the stables (Windstriker having been returned to the Celestial Realms so Miko didn't have to pay for him as well).

They were summoned to Azure City by Lord Shojo to act as the prosecution at the Order's trial on the charge of 'weakening the fabric of the universe', though they lost the case due to the whole thing being a sham perpetrated by Shojo and Eugene Greenhilt.[7][8] Due to Jones' skill at converting trial transcripts, his record is 5-0 while Mr. Rodriguez shoulders the defeats at 0-147.

Blood Runs in the FamilyEdit

The duo were not seen again until Belkar and Roy were put on trial in the Empire of Blood. There they served as defense council for both the Order, as well as the bounty hunters Gannji and Enor. In the challenging legal environment of Tarquin's empire, they went straight for a guilty verdict hoping for clemency.

At the Palace of Blood in Bleedingham, the flumphs (another running gag) switched places with the lawyers, ending with Haley falling on the lawyers, and the flumphs in court.[9]

TriviaEdit

Apart from the six members of the Order of the Stick themselves, Mr. Jones and Mr. Rodriguez are the only named characters from the webcomic version of The Order of the Stick to appear in the Dragon magazine OOTS comics, appearing in the first panel of the comic that ran in Dragon #351.

List of known legal activitiesEdit

  • Presumed to be the Prosecution for the Sauron v. Baggins trial.
  • Presumed to be the Prosecution for the Takhisis v. Everman trial.
  • Presumed to be the Prosecution for the Riddle v. Board of Education trial.
  • Presumed to be the Prosecution for the Witch of the East v. Gale trial.
  • Presumed to be the Prosecution for the Witch of the West v. Gale trial.
  • Enforced intellectual property of the "Squid Thingy".
  • Enforced a copyright infringement of Drizzt Do'Urden on Zz'dtri.
  • Presented a cease and desist on Miko Miyazaki on the behalf of Belkar Bitterleaf, claiming that her use of Detect Evil "clearly constitutes an illegal search" employing "harmful radiation".
  • Placed a restraining order on Belkar Bitterleaf on the behalf of Windstriker.
  • Prosecution for the Azure City v. Order of the Stick trial, with a Not Guilty verdict.
  • Defense for the Empire of Blood v. Greenhilt and Bitterleaf trial, with a Guilty verdict.
  • Defense for the Empire of Blood v. Gannji and Enor trial, with a Guilty verdict.
  • At least 146 other trials.

ReferencesEdit

  1. GiantITP Forum - Re: No love for Neutral alignments in OOTS, The Giant
  2. Comic #50, "The Semi-Secret Origin of Elan & Nale"
  3. Comic #32, "Biting the Hand that Feeds Me"
  4. Comic #65, "The Magic Words"
  5. Comic #228, "Unlawful Good"
  6. Comic #230, "The Law Strikes Back"
  7. Comic #268, "The Lawyers Strike Back"
  8. Comic #290, "Shojo's Big Secret"
  9. Comic #805, "Dropping In"
Appearances
Mr Jones: 32, 50, 65, 159, 228, 268, 271, 272, 278, 280, 282, 284, 287, 734, 735, 805, 806
Phil Rodriguez: 32, 65, 159, 230, 241, 268, 272, 280, 284, 287, 734, 735, 805, 806, 998

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