The Crayons of Time: The Snarl
Order of the Stick comic
Comic no. 274
Date published 31 January 2006
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Shojo tells of the deaths of the Eastern Gods and the destruction of World 1.0.

Cast Edit

Transcript Edit

[Transcribers note: all dialog from Shojo and Durkon is inset as a voiceover, only the others appear on-panel.]

Panel 1, Page 1

Lord Shojo: Until the day it struck.
Lord Shojo: Malevolent and powerful, it wanted nothing more than destruction. It slew Apollo and Ares outright in the first round of combat.
Lord Shojo: Then it systematically executed the remainder of the Eastern Gods: Hades, Poseidon, even gentle Demeter and fair Aphrodite. All of them.
Lord Shojo: Wise Zeus died last, still wondering what had happened.
Zeus: Why?
Durkon: Wait a minute, ye cannae kill tha gods. Tha's impossible.
Lord Shojo: For mere mortals like you or I, certainly, friend dwarf. But the Snarl was literally born of deific frustration and hostility.
Lord Shojo: Its claws cut through them like daggers through parchment.
Lord Shojo: Some have theorized that gods were even MORE vulnerable to the Snarl than a mortal of the same level would have been.

Panel 1, Page 2

Lord Shojo: Then, the Snarl turned its hungry eyes to the newly minted world below.
Lord Shojo: It rained bloody armageddon down on the world, devouring each and every soul, from the mightiest dragon to the tiniest of gnats. Nothing escaped it.
Lord Shojo: The gods of the other three pantheons looked on helplessly. They had seen the carnage Zeus' family had suffered, they knew they could not stand against this beast. But with every passing moment, millions of souls cried out in anguish, dying with prayers to impotent gods on their lips.

Panel 2, Page 2

Lord Shojo: Twenty-seven minutes after it revealed its existence, the Snarl had undone creation.

Panel 3, Page 2

Lord Shojo: The remaining gods hid in their Outer Plane homes, hoping the Snarl would not discover them. They hid for centuries.
Lord Shojo: But the chief deities met in secret, hatching a plan. They knew that when their beautiful world's life was cut short, all of the many threads of reality that had been woven into it were released.

Panel 4, Page 2

Lord Shojo: These threads could be used to fight the Snarl on its own terms. And so they pledged to work together to build a new world.
Lord Shojo: This time, the three pantheons would decide in advance who would create which part of the world. Each god would get a turn to create. There would be no fighting, just cooperation and harmony.
Monkey: OK, my turn? Ninjas.
Sif: What? Hey, we all agreed on this medieval knights-and-wizards theme!
Monkey: So? It's my turn, my choice, I say: NINJA!
Sif: ...
Sif: Fine.
Lord Shojo: Well, MOSTLY harmony.

D&D Context Edit

  • Sif's comment is an oblique reference to the oriental elements like samurai and ninja that are frequently shoved into D&D's feudal atmosphere.
  • It is unclear what level a mortal would need to be to be the same level as a god, although there is an interesting example in published D&D sources. In the Dragonlance setting, Raistlin Majere was able to make an attempt on the life of a goddess (Takhesis, a diety directly adapted from Tiamat). Source materials put him at 20th level, although this was 1st edition D&D and the attempt was unsuccessful. Certainly any attempt to put a mortal on the same level as a god would involve Epic level (20+) characters. Gods in the D&D 3.0 Deities and Demigods are mostly listed as having 30 to 50 character levels.

Trivia Edit

  • This is the final appearance of the Olympian gods which appeared in the previous comic: Zeus, Hades, and Ares.
  • This is the only appearance of the other Olympian gods: Aphrodite, Apollo, Demeter, and Poseidon.

External Links Edit