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That's a Surprisingly Common Reaction
Order of the Stick comic
OOTS0504
Comic no. 504
Date published 9 November 2007
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Vaarsuvius tries out Vaarsuvius' Enchanced Scrying.

Cast Edit

Transcript Edit

Panel 1

Durkon descends below deck on Hinjo's ship.
Durkon: Vaarsuvius?
Durkon: Are ye still down ‘ere? I haven’t seen ye in a few weeks…
Durkon: Come up an’ join tha party…

Panel 2

Vaarsuvius is casting, creating a large rectangular panel in front of them.
Durkon: Thor’s bicuspid! What’s all this?
Vaarsuvius: I am devising a new divination spell. I have almost completed it.

Panel 3

Vaarsuvius: As of yet, every existing divination or communication spell that either you or I have cast has failed to locate Miss Starshine—
Vaarsuvius: —so it stands to reason that a new spell of great potency might succeed, if only on account of it not being specifically blocked by the effect.
Vaarsuvius: I procured the necessary rule supplements at our last stop.

Panel 4

Durkon: Vaarsuvius, ye know tha we need ta be focusin’ our energy on findin’ Girard’s Gate, na Haley and Roy.
Vaarsuvius: In fact, I know no such thing.

Panel 5

Durkon: Look, I’ve known Roy longer ‘n any o’ ye. An I know tha if he were here, he’d want us ta protect tha Gate an’ forget aboot rescuin’ ‘im.
Vaarsuvius: If he were here, there would be no NEED to rescue him. He would already be here.
Durkon: Ye know wha I mean!

Panel 6

Durkon: If’n I had his corpse, I’d raise ‘im this instant, but wha good will it do ta throw our lives away after ‘is? Haley tried, an’ now she’s lost too.
Vaarsuvius: Of course it is easy for you to forsake them. It is not your fault they became trapped behind enemy lines.

Panel 7

Durkon: V, no one blames ye fer runnin’ when ye ran out o’ spells then…
Vaarsuvius: Of course not. Fleeing at that point was the only sound tactical decision.

Panel 8

Vaarsuvius: I am saying I am to blame for my magic not being powerful enough to avoid that situation in the first place.
Vaarsuvius: I could have saved the lives of countless soldiers with only a slightly greater application of arcane force, but I did not possess the capacity.
Varsuvius: I could not even protect myself from the death knight—I needed a thinly veiled deus ex machina to save my life!

Panel 9

Vaarsuvius: Do you remember when I was obsessed day in and out over gaining more knowledge? What happened? I wasted my time on… on juvenile pranks with a sociopathic halfling!
Vaarsuvius: I will not make the same mistake again. I will not allow Miss Starshine to continue to suffer because my spells continue to fail!

Panel 10

Vaarsuvius: For this purpose, I have researched this new spell:
Vaarsuvius: Vaarsuvius’ Enhanced Scrying! Show me Haley Starshine!!

Panel 11

The scrying window displays an error:

404 Not Found
The person cannot be displayed.
The person you are looking for is unavailable…
location might be experiencing technical difficulties,
…may need to adjust your scrying settings.
 
Try the following: Click the Refresh spell, or try again later.
…spoke the person’s name aloud, make sure that it was pronounced correctly.
 


Panel 12

Vaarsuvius: NOOOOOOOO!!!

D&D Context Edit

  • Independent spell research is only briefly mentioned in the basic rule books. This is why V mentions procuring additional rule supplements; presumably the rules which spell out the limits of what original spells can do are in these supplements, and were used to create Vaarsuvius' Enhanced Scrying.
  • Attaching the name of the spell creator is common for original spells; some of the classic spells in the game have the names of the game creator's characters attached, such as Mordenkainen and Bigby.

Trivia Edit

  • 404 Not Found is a standard response code in Hypertext Transfer Protocol (HTTP), the protocol of the World Wide Web. The Not Found error is usually sent when a client requests a page from a server that does not exist, often from dead or broken links.
  • This is Vaarsuvius' first appearance in Don't Split the Party.

External Links Edit

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