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Sword Speak
Order of the Stick comic
OOTS0297
Comic no. 297
Date published 28 March 2006
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Roy discovers that his sword, though not originally starmetal, can be reforged as a starmetal sword that will cause extra damage to undead.

Cast Edit

Transcript Edit

Panel 1

Roy: You're saying that there is no starmetal in my sword.
Smith: Correct.
Roy: None.
Smith: Correct.
Roy: Not even a little?
Smith: Your sword was fashioned entirely of everday[sic] terrestrial steel, sir.

Panel 2

Roy: Why would that dwarf lie to me?
Smith: I am a forger of swords, sir, not a speculator on dwarven motives for falsehood.

Panel 3

Roy: Well...I guess THIS won't be of much use to me.
Smith: By Monkey's tail! I've never seen such a bounty of starmetal!

Panel 4

Smith: It would be an honor to reforge your blade as a starmetal sword, sir.
Roy: But... there's not enough metal here for that!

Panel 5

Smith: Sir, a blade that size made of pure starmetal would weigh 300 pounds and require the use of all of the starmetal that has ever fallen from the sky, ever.
Smith: Most of it does tend to burn up, in the atmosphere, you know.

Panel 6

Smith: An alloy of the starmetal with your sword's original steel would make a potent weapon however.
Roy: How potent?

Panel 7

Smith: I estimate a 25% increase in attack accuracy, with a corresponding enhancement to damage.
Roy: It's OK, you can just say "+5 sword" here. We do stuff like that all the time.
Smith: Oh. Then yes, a +5 sword.

Panel 8

Smith: After the forging is complete, though, you may notice one...side effect.
Roy: Fantastic. Because, you know, nothing can ever be just randomly positive.

Panel 9

Smith: It is likely that your sword will sometimes glow with a deadly green energy that is particularly harmful to the undead.

Panel 10

Smith: In order to counteract, I recommend—
Roy: No, no, I think I'll manage to somehow struggle through.

D&D Context Edit

  • A "+5 sword" means a sword with a +5 enhancement, which provides a plus 5 on rolls to hit and a plus five on rolls to damage. It's generally considered bad role-playing to discuss game mechanics in in-character speech. Part of the humor of the OOTS comic is that the characters discuss such things all the time.

Trivia Edit

  • Nale revealed that he sent Roy off on the sidequest for starmetal as a diversion so they could regroup in #142, Misdirection and Subterfuge. In typical fashion for Nale, the ruse backfires, giving Roy an opportunity to improve his sword.
  • This is the first appearance of the Azurite Swordsmith.

External Links Edit

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