One Chance
Order of the Stick comic
Comic no. 629
Date published 5 February 2009
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The Ancient Black Dragon explains her plans to murder Vaarsuvius' family as vengeance for the destruction of her own child.

Cast Edit

Transcript Edit

Panel 1, Page 1

Outside Vaarsuvius' cottage in Ivyleaf, the voices of his family come from within.
Black Dragon (inset): You have two children, both age 26, left in the care of your mate, in the village of Ivyleaf, in the northern reaches of the Elven Homeland.
Black Dragon (inset): Your cottage is tan, with red shutters.
Black Dragon (inset): I have been there twice already, invisibly...studying it.
Child: <Parent, do you think Other Parent will be returning home soon?>*
Inkyrius: <I'm not sure, Loved One. I think one of these years, certainly.>
Footnote: "* Translated from Elven."

Panel 2, Page 1

Inside the cottage, Inkyrius serves a bowl of greens to their children.
Auburn-Haired Child: <I hope so, I made a picture of Other Parent from glitter and maccaroni. I would very much like to present it.>
Green-Haired Child: <I helped!>
Auburn-Haired Child: <Did not!>
Inkyrius: <Oh, that is beautiful! I am sure it will be well-received when your Other Parent finishes mastering the ways of magic and comes home.>
Inkyrius: <Now go wash up, both of you. Lunch is ready.>
Black Dragon (inset): They should be home from kindergarten by now, don't you think?

Panel 3, Page 1

Cut back to Tiny Island, where the Black Dragon is pinning Vaarsuvius to the ground.
Black Dragon: When I am done speaking, I am going to teleport directly there, and then I will eat them alive.
Black Dragon: Slowly.
Black Dragon: Feet-first.

Panel 1, Page 2

Black Dragon: I will then bind their souls to me with two necromantic scrolls that I acquired for this purpose.
Black Dragon: And I will disappear.
Black Dragon: I will leave this plane of existence, and you will never find me.

Panel 2, Page 2

Black Dragon: I tell you all of this because it is not enough for me to simply kill you.
Black Dragon: You have taken my baby from me. I demand that you suffer the full measure of pain that I feel.
Black Dragon: As a parent, I am sure you understand.

Panel 3, Page 2

Vaarsuvius: No! You monstrous—
Vaarsuvius tries to grapple the dragons foot.
Black Dragon: Your struggles are meaningless. If you had any power to stop me, you would have already used it.
Black Dragon: Without your magic, you are nothing. With your are still less than I am.

Panel 4, Page 2

Black Dragon: Humanoids. You think that just because my kind has stats for every stage of growth, it is perfectly acceptable to murder our children.
Black Dragon: Let us see how much XP your brood is worth, shall we? It will only take a few minutes.

Panel 5, Page 2

Black Dragon: Who knows? Maybe I'll go all the way and skin your mate alive for a garment. Perhaps a hat.
Black Dragon: Dismiss Anti-magic Field.

Panel 6, Page 2

Vaarsuvius leaps up.
Vaarsuvius: You shall not depart this place!
Vaarsuvius: Dimensional Anchor!

Panel 7, Page 2

Dimensional Anchor misses the Black Dragon.

Panel 8, Page 2

Black Dragon: Your aim really is terrible these days, isn't it?
Black Dragon: Greater Teleport.

Panel 9, Page 2

Black Dragon teleports away, "POP!"

Panel 10, Page 2

Vaarsuvius stands angry, some spell burning around V's hand.

Panel 11, Page 2

Vaarsuvius stands unbelieving.

Panel 12, Page 2

Vaarsuvius looks shocked.

Panel 13, Page 2

Vaarsuvius clutches at his or her head.
Vaarsuvius: AAAAARGH!!!!!

D&D Context Edit

  • There are 12 age categories for dragons in D&D. They reach their greatest size and power after 1201 years, achieving "Great wyrm" status. This dragon is "Ancient" meaning it is between 801 and 1,000 years old.
  • Dimensional Anchor blocks any type of extradimensional travel, including teleportation.
  • V seems to have a circumstance penalty to attack rolls due to the extended trance deprivation.
  • Greater Teleport allows instantaneous travel with no range limit and always arrives where intended.

Trivia Edit

  • The title refers to the one chance V had to prevent the dragon from attacking his family when V cast dimensional anchor but missed the attack roll.
  • This is the first appearance of Vaarsuvius' family: Inyrius, Vaarsuvius' Auburn-Haired Child, and Vaarsuvius' Green-Haired Child.

External Links Edit

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