No Offense, Aaron
Order of the Stick comic
Comic no. 229
Date published 5 October 2005
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The assassins discover a limitation of stick figure comics.

Cast Edit

Transcript Edit

Panel 1

Redaxe: What did ye learn?
Shadowdancer: I couldn't hear what they were saying; some halfling in the room next door was laughing too loud about something.
Shadowdancer: But from what I saw, the King of Nowhere checked in two days early. He's here, now.

Panel 2

Shadowdancer: But he's not alone. I counted nine people there with him:
Shadowdancer: Six members of the hotel staff, his dwarven advisor, his court jester, and a red-haired girl I presume is a prostitute.

Panel 3

Redaxe: Och, well, tha's good news aboot tha king bein' early. Gives us extra time to go an' kill 'im dead before the peace conference wit' tha King o' Somewhere.

Panel 4

Redaxe: But tha's too many folks thar ta use tha explosives. I don't get paid by tha body count.
Shadowdancer: True, plus we need to keep a low profile on this job.
Redaxe: Aye, this'll be a tricky one.

Panel 5

Shadowdancer: Wait, I have a great idea!
Shadowdancer: The king's room is what, twenty feet straight down? Maybe thirty?
Redaxe: Aye, what of it?

Panel 6

Shadowdancer: So I'm a shadowdancer, blessed with magical powers over darkness.
Shadowdancer: All I have to do is jump into a shadow here, and I can magically teleport to any shadow in the king's room.
Shadowdancer: I leap out, stab him with my poisoned blade, and use the shadows to escape back here.

Panel 7

Beat. The dwarf glares at the shadowdancer.

Panel 8

Redaxe: Jump inta tha shadows, will ye?
Shadowdancer: Yes.

Panel 9

Redaxe: You dinnae notice a flaw in yer plan?
Shadowdancer: No.
Redaxe: A crucial fund'mental flaw?
Shadowdancer: No!

Panel 10

Redaxe: Thar's no shadows! It's a friggin' stick figure comic, ye moron!

Panel 11

Shadowdancer: Huh. You know, I've been a member of this prestige class for years, and I never actually noticed that before.
Redaxe: I knew I should've taken tha job at "Nodwick".

D&D Context Edit

  • The Shadowdancer is a Prestige Class that allows a character to teleport between shadows.

Trivia Edit

  • The title and the dwarf's last line refer to the webcomic Nodwick by Aaron Williams. Nodwick, like the Order of the Stick, was once published in Dragon magazine, prior to that magazine ending print publication.

External Links Edit

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