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Lesson Fail
Order of the Stick comic
OOTS0869
Comic no. 869
Date published 12 February 2013
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Malack and Belkar both agree on the worth of each other's life, as well as the value in living for others. Combat ensues.

Cast Edit

Transcript Edit

Panel 1

Belkar: What the—? You're not an elf at all!
Malack: Nor have I ever been mistaken for one.

Panel 2

Belkar: You're Tarquin's bud, right? Linear-Guild-ing it up after all.
Belkar: Is Nale back there? 'Cause I was right in the middle of totally killing him.
Malack: Hrrrm. Now, I am torn.

Panel 3

Malack: On one claw, you oppose my longtime friend and ally, Tarquin. But on the other, you also oppose the slayer of my kin.
Belkar: Also, creepy reptile dudes sneaking up on me. I oppose that so hard.

Panel 4

Malack: I could let you live—in the hopes that you will complete your task and end Nale's life in a manner in which I will not be directly responsible.
Malack: But no. That is not Lord Nergal's way. My god teaches me to kill that which I would see dead.

Panel 5

Malack: Not to send proxies in my stead. Thus, your life has little value to me.
Belkar: Yeah? Well, your life is strictly bargain bin material too, but you don't hear me droning on about it.

Panel 6

Malack: Excellent. Then we understand one another.
Belkar: Two men enter, one dashingly handsome halfling leaves.

Panel 7

Belkar: I've got bad news for you, pal.
Belkar:Thanks to Mr. Scruffy, I finally get why Roy and those guys are always trying to defend other people.
Belkar: Because now, I have someone worth fighting for.
Belkar: And if there's one thing I know for sure—

Panel 8

Belkar: —it's that guys who spout corny lines like, "I have someone worth fighting for," always win for some weird reason.

Panel 9

Belkar: Halfling rage att—

Panel 10

Malack: Hold Person.

Panel 11

Belkar is held mid leap. He comes down head-first on Malack's snout, "bonk!"

Panel 11

Malack's snout grows a large welt from the impact. Mr. Scruffy paws at the immobile Belkar.
Malack: Hrrrm.
Malack: Typical.

D&D Context Edit

  • Hold Person is a 2nd level spell which freezes the subject in place if they fail a Will save.
  • Belkar's "Halfling Rage Attack/Halfling Rage Jumping Attack" is not a canonical class or race feature or feat. However, it may combine the Barbarian Rage ability with the Bounding Assault feat from the 2006 D&D 3.5 edition Player's Handbook II. The Rage feature would give him +2 to Will saves, making his failure to make a saving throw against the Hold Person indicative of a low Wisdom score. His actual Wisdom score is estimated to be either 8 or 9.

Trivia Edit

  • Though Belkar often performs jumping attacks this is only one of two times were he declares a "halfling rage (jumping) attack" as he does here and in #176, Leaping Lizards. In this case, of course, the attempt is curtailed.

External Links Edit

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