I See a Red Robe and I Want to Paint it Black
Order of the Stick comic
Comic no. 635
Date published 3 March 2009
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Vaarsuvius gets spliced and gains the "benefit" of an evil chorus.

Cast Edit

Transcript Edit

Panel 1

Vaarsuvius is in the center of a thaumaturgic triangle inscribed within a magic circle. Their robes have turned black and their teeth have become pointy, as well as their eyes being entirely pink. The three souls are tethered to them by chains of magic energy.
Vaarsuvius: Ha ha HA ha HA HA ha HA ha!
Ganonron: Crush the world beneath your heel.
Haerta: Destroy everyone who has ever slighted you.
Jephton: Tear down creation just to see if you can.

Panel 2

Vaarsuvius: Wait... why am I laughing? I don't... the voices...
Ganonron: Kill anything beautiful.
Haerta: Take what you want.
Jephton: Desecrate everything.
Cedrik: You may be experiencing some feedback. You know, alignment-wise.
Lee: Do not let them influence your actions! YOU are the one in control!
Nero: Now go, and save your family!

Panel 3

Ganonron: Punish the dragon-bitch.
Haerta: Make her suffer.
Jephton: Make her suffering exquisite.
Vaarsuvius: Yes... I will go now.
Vaarsuvius: Greater Teleport.

Panel 4

Vaarsuvius disappears with a "pop!"

Panel 5

Nero: Well, that went fairly well.
Lee: Everything is coming together quite nicely.
Cedrik: Yes, we've certainly thrown our chips in the pot now, haven't we?
Qarr: That was just... that was like a master class in temptation. I'm in awe.
Qarr: Just one question: What's the deal with that music?

Panel 6

Nero: Oh, that? That's just the choir of dead pedophiles.
Lee: We snip 'em fresh every morning so they keep that high pitch.
Cedrik: Call me old fashioned, but an evil ascension to power just isn't the same without someone chanting faux Latin the background.
Choir (singing): ♪Bunkus! Nonsuch! Gibberos! Gobbleygoos!♪
Choir (singing): ♪Bunkus! Nonsuch! Gibberos! Gobbleygoos!

D&D Context Edit

  • In the Dragonlance D&D campaign setting, wizards are organized by Alignment and wear corresponding colors: white for Good wizards, Red for Neutral wizards, and Black for Evil wizards. Vaarsuvius has, up until this point, exhibited the qualities of a True Neutral character, and has always worn red robes (despite the Order of the Stick not taking place on Krynn). V keeps with this convention by changing to black robes when spliced with the evil mages.
  • V initially appears within a Magic Circle spell. In the AD&D (1st edition) Dungeon Master's Guide, the outer ring of arcane symbols is described as a "magic circle" and the inner circle with inscribed triangle is described as a "thaumaturgic triangle".
  • Greater Teleport is a 7th level spell and allows instantaneous travel between two points on the same plane of existence with no range limit and no chance of error.

Trivia Edit

  • The title is a reference to the Rolling Stones' #1 hit single from 1966 Paint it Black. The color being in reference to V's robes as above. The title of the strip following this one would also feature a Rolling Stones reference.
  • The runes surrounding the magic circle spell out "bet you thought you had found a secret message in this didn't you", using the "Dark Arts" font by Blambot.
  • Choirs of Castratos, men castrated as boys to preserve their child's voice, existed since at least AD 400 in the Byzantine Empire. They were prized for their superior singing ability, particularly for liturgical music and opera. Their use in Europe declined in the 18th century. The last castrato died in 1922, and made recordings of his voice.

External Links Edit

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