Heck of a Fight
Order of the Stick comic
Comic no. 453
Date published 17 May 2007
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Hinjo deals with threats from all sides, with a little help from Durkon.

Cast Edit

Transcript Edit

Panel 1, Page 1

Hinjo is riding Argent.
Hinjo: Hurry! They need us at the breach!
Hinjo: Argent, run as fast as you can!

Panel 2, Page 1

The huecuva strikes Hinjo, who gets dismounted.
Huecuva: I know I was ordered to withdraw, but I haven't gotten my Recommended Daily Value of dead heroes yet.
Huecuva: A huecuva's gotta stay healthy, you know.

Panel 3, Page 1

Argent takes the huecuva in his enormous jaws.
Argent: grrrrRRUFF!!

Panel 4, Page 1

Huecuva: Poison!
Argent: Raar!!

Panel 5, Page 1

Argent collapses under the effects of the poison.
Argent: uwwwwww. uwwwwww. uwwwwww.
Hinjo: Argent! I'm sorry, friend, looks like I must send you back to the Celestial Realms to purge the poison from you.

Panel 6, Page 1

Argent is fading into the celestial realms.
Hinjo: And as for you...
Hinjo: Nobody invades my city—

Panel 7, Page 1

Hinjo: —and absolutely NOBODY HURTS MY DOG!!
Hinjo lays into the huecuva with his dark-metal katana, "slash! slash! slash!"
Huecuva: GAH!

Panel 8, Page 1

Huecuva: HARM!
Hinjo: I can make any saving throw you can dish out, skeleton.

Panel 9, Page 1

Hinjo: Smite Evil!
Hinjo delivers a mighty overhead strike, "SLASH!"

Panel 10, Page 1

Two ninjas hit Hinjo from the back, "shfrtch! shfrtch!"
Ninja #1: Daimyo Kubota sends his regards.
Ninja #1: Is it too early to say, "Lord Kubota"?
Ninja #2: It does have a nice ring to it.

Panel 11, Page 1

Hinjo: Oh, you've GOT to be kidding me!! NOW??
Hinjo: The city is being invaded as we speak!

Panel 12, Page 1

Ninja #2: Yes, and when House Kubota recaptures it from the hobgoblins next week, the people will cheer.
Ninja #1: The daimyo believes strongly in long-term planning.

Panel 1, Page 2

Hinjo: Fine, I can fight the two of you, wherever you come from.
Ninja #1: Uh, ninjas?
Ninja #2: We've been standing next to you for like four hours.

Panel 2, Page 2

Huecuva: HEY! No kill-stealing!
Huecuva hits Hinjo and Ninja #1 with a blast of flame. Ninja #1 dies, Ninja #2 evades.

Panel 3, Page 2

Ninja #2: HEY! You got your hatred of all that's good and pure in my contract killing.
Huecuva: Well you got your contract killing in my hatred of all that's good and pure!

Panel 4, Page 2

Ninja #2: You wanna fight? There's only one ninja left, that means I'm death incarnate!
Huecuva: Bring it on, Little Boy Blue!
Hinjo: Gentlemen! Gentlemen!

Panel 5, Page 2

Hinjo: As the only neutral party who doesn't care which one of you gets the kill, I think I have a fair compromise.

Panel 6, Page 2

Hinjo: I call my proposal, "Giant Dwarf with a hammer."
Huecuva: Huh?
Ninja #2: That doesn't make any—

Panel 7, Page 2

Giant Durkon slams the Huecuva and the Ninja with the hammer and kills them both.

Panel 8, Page 2

Durkon shrinks back to his normal size as his spell ends.
Durkon: Sorry it took so long ta catch up. Short legs.
Hinjo: ...
Hinjo: You were 15 feet tall.
Durkon: Aye, an' you'd think it would matter, but it never seems ta work out tha way.

Panel 9, Page 2

Durkon: As I ran, I prayed ta Thor ta grant me extra speed...
Durkon: Heal!
Durkon: But I guess he's off listenin' ta some other cleric today.

Panel 10, Page 2

Tiger: grrrAWRrr!
Thor: OK! OK! We'll stay up in the northern lands and leave you guys in the south alone.
Thor: Just relax get some catnip.

Panel 11, Page 2

Thor: Geez, I mean, you bend the rules for a follower ONE TIME, and they never let you live it down.
Argent appears in the Celestial Realms with a "pop!"
Odin: Ooooo! Doggie!
Thor: Dad, don't pet it, you don't know where it's been.

D&D Context Edit

  • The Huecuva is a priest cursed by its god to serve in undeath. It first appeared in the 1981 Fiend Folio for AD&D (1st edition). It also appears in 2nd edition, and was updated for D&D 3.0 in the 2003 version of the Fiend Folio, having aready been introduced for that edition in the pages of Dungeon magazine.
  • Poison is a 4th level cleric spell which works like a powerful Constitution poision
  • Harm is a 6th level spell which does 10 points/level damage (max 150), or half that on a successful saving throw, which in this case Hinjo made. The cleric level of the Huecuva is unclear but must be at least 11th level to cast the spell, meaning Hinjo took at least 55 points of damage.
  • Smite Evil is a Paladin ability which allows him to add 1 point/level of damage to a weapon attack if the target is evil.
  • Thor's Might is Durkon's special version of Righteous Might which grants him great size and strength.
  • Heal is a 6th level cleric spell which in many ways is the opposite of Harm. It automatically restores the subject to full hit points (hp).
  • In some games as a house rule, the Dungeon Master (DM) will award experience points to the character who actually kills a given monster, rather than to the whole party, thus, "Kill stealing" is when one character does all the work wearing down an opponent but another steals the kill and the Experience Points, (XP)

Trivia Edit

  • This strip reveals more plainly the machinations of Daimyo Kubota, who up until now had only been unhelpful to the defense of the city, rather than outright traitorous.
  • This is the only appearance of Kubota's Ninja Assassins, who appear in both pages of this strip.
  • Thor bent the rules for Durkon when he allowed his Control Weather spell to create a specific weather effect in #352, which Thor reacts to in #353.
  • This is the final appearance of Tiger, the god of the Pantheon of Twelve Earthly Branches, thus far in the comic. Tiger first appeared in #273, The Crayons of Time: Doodles on the Sketch Pad of Eternity.
  • This is the final appearacne of the Huecuva, the second of the Xykon Decoys to be destroyed. It first appeared in #426, Three of a Kind.

External Links Edit

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