FANDOM


Escape Clause
Order of the Stick comic
OOTS0699
Comic no. 699
Date published 17 January 2010
Comic chronology
← Previous Next →
"Stopping for Direction" "They Would Likely Both Disagree with That Sentiment"
Comic list
View the comic
View discussion

MitD tries to teleport someone again.

Cast Edit

Transcript Edit

Panel 1

MitD: ESCAPE!

Panel 2

Hobgoblin watches, nothing happens

Panel 3

MitD: I said, "ESCAPE!"

Panel 4

Hobgoblin watches, nothing happens

Panel 5

MitD: Escape! Exit! Vanish! Scram! Vamoose! Skedaddle!
Demon-Roach #1: Egress!
Demon-Roach #2: Abscond!

Panel 6

MitD: Darn it, why isn't it working?
Hobgoblin: Are you sure the Supreme Leader said this was OK?
MitD: Oh, yeah, he gave me a direct order.

Panel 7

MitD: Hey Redcloak, I need—
Redcloak: Go bother someone else.

Panel 8

Hobgoblin: OK, well, maybe you can tell me what it is you're trying to do?
MitD: I'm trying to make you disappear. No, wait what's the word?
MitD: Tell-a-pork.
Hobgoblin: ...Teleport?
MitD: yeah.
Demon-Roach #1: Quick, go trademark "teleporking".
Demon-Roach #2: We'll make a fortune on the internet!

Panel 9

Hobgobin: Teleporting usually requires some form of magic. You're just shouting synonyms at me.
MitD: But I don't know any magic! Magic is for smart people, usually, and everyone here tells me that I'm as dumb as things that are really dumb.

Panel 10

Hobgoblin: Then let's forget the whole thing and I can get back to work.
MitD: But I need to know if my friend is safe!!
Demon-Roach: That jerk?

Panel 11

MitD: What if I—Uh I mean, someone—accidentally teleported him into the ocean? Or into a wall? Or into a big pit of angry tortoises??
MitD: What if he ended up on one of those other planes everyone's always talking about?
MitD: He doesn't have a carry-on with him. And no one checked his shoes!
MitD: How can he be safe if no one checked his shoes?!?

Panel 12

Hobgoblin: Yeah, OK, I'm getting that feeling that I should have been doing anything else this whole time.
MitD: No, wait! Come back! Please, I need to know! He's my best friend ever!

Panel 13

MITD: ...
MITD: ESCAPE!
Demon-Roach #1: I thought you'd never ask.
Demon-Roach #2: Wait up.

D&D Context Edit

Trivia Edit

  • The title is a play on an escape clause in a contract and using the word "escape" in a clause in a sentence.
  • Scanning shoes with an X-ray is the result of the shoe bomber's attempt to conceal explosives in his shoes and blow up an airplane.
  • Telepork.com was copyrighted in 2016.

External Links Edit

Ad blocker interference detected!


Wikia is a free-to-use site that makes money from advertising. We have a modified experience for viewers using ad blockers

Wikia is not accessible if you’ve made further modifications. Remove the custom ad blocker rule(s) and the page will load as expected.