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Collision Testing
Order of the Stick comic
OOTS0960
Comic no. 960
Date published 13 August 2014
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Belkar gets a new psionic dagger.

Cast Edit

Transcript Edit

Panel 1

Belkar: —and somehow it’s my fault for causing trouble! Please tell me you can see through that glorified mosquito’s ruse!
Vaarsuvius: In point of fact, I remain unmoved on the issue, one way or the other.

Panel 2

Vaarsuvius: Given…recent events…I am inclined not to make assumptions on the vampire’s intent based on his biology (or lack thereof).
Vaarsuvius: However, unlike our human companions, I see no reason to extend to him the trust that the late Master Thundershield had earned.

Panel 3

Belkar: Oh come on! Get off the fence! I just told you that he tried to kill me!!
Vaarsuvius: Oh my, what a completely unprecedented reaction to spending more than ten minutes in your company.

Panel 4

Belkar: Ugh, fine. At least you’re not spoonfeeding your blood into his open mouth.
Belkar: Whatever happened to basic adventurer paranoia, though? It’s like these people have never had a ceiling come to life before and try to smother them before!

Panel 5

Vaarsuvius: Fascinating, but if we might focus on the purpose for which I have summoned you here?
Vaarsuvius: My divinations indicate this dagger that we retrieved from Elan’s progenitor is more potent than your current weaponry.
Vaarsuvius: I took the liberty of removing the red pleather hilt wrap.

Panel 6

Belkar: Well it’s about time I got a magic weapon upgrade! The bard’s gotten two, and he fights like an incontinent weasel.
Vaarsuvius: I defer to your greater experience with both fisticuffs and mustelid evacuation habits.

Panel 7

Vaarsuvius: The dagger’s power is psionic rather than magical, however— likely crafted by the psion with whom I engaged.
Vaarsuvius: It posses maximal efficiency enhancements in addition to psionically shifting its mass as you strike to increase force.
Belkar: Whoa…that is a seriously weird feeling. Like swinging a half-empty bottle of cough syrup.

Panel 8

Belkar: I don’t know, it’s going to take some getting used to…

Panel 9

Cut to the deck of the Mechane. Belkar leaps and plunges the dagger into the vampire Durkon's skull, "KRTHUNK!"

Panel 10

Dominated by "Durkon", Belkar does a backflip off the side of the airship.

Panel 11

Roy retrieves Belkar in a cargo net.

Panel 12

Cut back to Vaarsuvius' cabin.
Belkar: It’s fine, thanks.

D&D Context Edit

  • In panel 4, Belkar refers to the Luker, a classic type of D&D monster which resembles the ceiling of a room, and drops down on unsuspecting adventurers to suffocate and eat them. Lurkers were first introduced for D&D in The Strategic Review #3 (August 1975), the forerunner to Dragon magazine. It also appeared in the 1977 AD&D Monster Manual. It was adapted to D&D 3.0 edition in the 2003 Underdark supplement.

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