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Beast Practices
Order of the Stick comic
OOTS1037
Comic no. 1037
Date published 20 May 2016
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Oona has a conversation with the Monster In The Darkness, about her locating O-Chul and Lien near the North Pole, and about loyalty.

Cast Edit

Transcript Edit

Panel 1

Oona: Very good, Great Beast in Shadow. Is nice. Duckies are nice.
Monster in the Darkness: Duckies are nice! I got to pick this one myself.
Demon-Roach: Goodbye Kitty, I guess.

Panel 2

Oona: Your master, he is not here?
Monster in the Darkness: Who?
Oona: Bone man, with shiny hat.
Monster in the Darkness: Xykon's not my master. He's just, like, a guy I hang around with.
Monster in the Darkness: For some reason.

Panel 3

Oona: No, no, no. No good. Beast must always respect master, is way of things.
Oona: Master takes care of beast, beast takes care of master.
Monster in the Darkness: OK, but—

Panel 4

Oona: See Greyview. Good worg, yes? Together many years. And what is foundation of bond?
Monster in the Darkness: I'm gonna say...respect?
Oona: Yes! Good. Learning is happening.

Panel 5

Monster in the Darkness: OK, I get it, but...Xykon's not actually my master, so...
Greyview: Is futile to argue. Nod. Get treat.

Panel 6

Monster in the Darkness: I kinda think I'm not supposed to go along with something that's wrong just to get food.
Greyview: Only certainty in life: when icy jaws of death come, you will not have had enough treats.
Greyview: Nod. Get treat.

Panel 7

Oona: Oh! Almost got special dinner for you! Saw it while exercising Lancer, but it fell in drink.
Oona: Two humans, since you said you had one back in city and liked it best of all.

Panel 8

Monster in the Darkness: That is...not at all what I meant. But thanks, I guess?
Oona: No, no. Do not mention. Embarrassing failure not worth discussing ever again.

Panel 9

Oona: You are magnificent monster, fit for beastmistress like me. But will honor your bond with bone man. Strange he keeps you in dark, though.
Monster in the Darkness: Ugh, don't even get me started.

Panel 10

Oona: Snuck peek under old umbrella when you got here. Such majesty! Like in wildest dreams, after remorhaz kebab too close to bed.
Oona: So small, though. But will grow in time!

Panel 11

Oona: If bone man dies horrible death, life with Oona would not be bad, yes?
Monster in the Darkness: Uh, I guess. But Xykon's pretty strong, so I don't think he's going to die a horrible death.
Greyview: All deaths horrible. Also inevitable.
Greyview: Nod. Get treat.

D&D Context Edit

  • Oona is a Beastmaster, a D&D 3.5 prestige class published in the 2005 Complete Adventurer supplement.
  • The Remorhaz is a classic monster in D&D, first published in Dragon magazine #2, and subsequently in the 1977 AD&D (1st Edition) Monster Manual.

Trivia Edit

  • Having been introduced to Oona's animal companions Lancer and Greyview in #1032 and #1036 respectively, here we learn their names and that Oona is a beastmaster to them.
  • MitD's previous umbrella had a Hello Kitty design.

External Links Edit

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