Too impatient to wait for Roy's resurrection, Vaarsuvius decides to take on Xykon alone.
Cast[]
- The Order of the Stick
- Roy Greenhilt (also as spirit) ◀ ▶
- Haley Starshine ◀ ▶
- Belkar Bitterleaf ◀ ▶
- Durkon Thundershield ◀ ▶
- Vaarsuvius (Soul Spliced) ◀ ▶
- Celia ◀ ▶
- Ganonron ◀ ▶
- Jephton the Unholy ◀ ▶
Transcript[]
- Panel 1
Durkon is holding Roy's skull in one hand and Haley's diamond in the other. He is surrounded by a white glow.
Durkon: Resurrection!
- Panel 2
Durkon: Resurrection!
- Panel 3
Durkon: Resurrection!
Vaarsuvius: What in the unholy blazes is that dwarf doing?
Haley: Raising Roy from the dead. It has a ten-minute casting time.
- Panel 4
Vaarsuvius: TEN MINUTES?!?
Haley: Yeah. You didn't know that?
Vaarsuvius: How should I know who long divine spells take to cast? It is not as if they were REAL magic!
- Panel 5
Haley: Why are you getting so upset? After all this time, what difference do ten minutes make?
Vaarsuvius: Do you have any idea how much I could accomplish in ten minutes with the power I now wield?
Haley: Not really. I'm a little fuzzy on the specif—
- Panel 6
Vaarsuvius: I will NOT stand by passively while my debt grows with each moment!
Haley: Debt? What debt?
Vaarsuvius: Nothing with which you need concern yourself, except insofar as I have incurred too much of it already to waste what time I have left.
Ganonron: 19 minutes, 41 seconds.
Jephton: And counting.
- Panel 7
Vaarsuvius: It is well and good that the dwarf raises Sir Greenhilt. While he does so, however, I intend to engage our problems from... an alternate angle.
Vaarsuvius: One I should have addressed immediately.
Haley: Huh? What are you talking about?
- Panel 8
Vaarsuvius: I am going to go and kill Xykon.
Vaarsuvius: I will return shortly.
Ganonron: We will obliterate him.
Jephton: 2-3 rounds, tops.
- Panel 9
Roy: No! V, don't try it!
Haley: What?!? Are you nuts??
Celia: *gasp!*
Belkar: I was only kidding when I said we'd be killing Xykon in five strips! You can't take anything I say in the last panel seriously!
- Panel 10
Celia: Vaarsuvius, Xykon has this fancy anti-teleport spell surrounding his tower in Azure City. You can't just—
Vaarsuvius: I appreciate the tactical data, but it will present no problem.
- Panel 11
Roy: Hey! You subcontractor guys!
Roy: You need to tell him that I said this was a bad idea!
Ganonron: Did you hear something?
Jephton: No, I didn't hear anything, heh heh.
Vaarsuvius: I am done waiting. I will end this now.
- Panel 12
Roy: Damn it, listen to me! Xykon is smarter than he looks! He'll crush you all, and you'll end up—
Vaarsuvius: They cannot rob me of this victory. I have paid too much for it already.
Vaarsuvius: EPIC TELEPORT!
Jephton: Looks like we're seeing some turbulence...
Ganonron: Nothing I can't—nnh!—handle!
- Panel 13
Vaarsuvius disappears, "POP!"
Roy:—just like me.
D&D Context[]
- The title refers to the ten minute casting time for the Resurrection spell. 10 minutes is 100 rounds of combat.
- Resurrection is a 7th level spell which raises a creature from the dead, even if their body is not whole. The material component is a diamond or diamonds worth at least 10,000 gp.
- Epic Teleport is an epic-level spell. Ordinarily Teleport or Greater Teleport would suffice, but Vaarsuvius is attempting to teleport into Gobbotopia which is currently protected by the epic-level abjuration, Cloister, which would block any lower-level attempts to teleport in.