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The Battle of Azure City comes to an end as Team Evil now owns the city.

Cast[]

Transcript[]

Panel 1

Hobgoblin: —and we estimate about 10,000 dead on each side, counting both the battle and the explosion. The good news is, that's only one-third of our force, and almost all of theirs
Redcloak: I guess that's something, then. How are the men?
Hobgoblin: Shaken, but holding in there.

Panel 2

Redcloak: Good. And the general?
Hobgoblin: I'm sorry, supreme leader. He was in the courtyard.
Redcloak: Damn it. OK, get back to your legion and relay my orders.
Hobgoblin: Yes, sir.

Panel 3

Xykon: So, just about ready for us to get out of here?
Redcloak: "Get our of here?" Why would we do that??
Xykon: Uh, because they won and we lost? Didn't you get the memo, it was taped to an exploding castle?

Panel 4

Redcloak: We didn't lose. We destroyed the Sapphire Guard.
Redcloak: Oh, sure, there might be a few stray paladins here and there, but their numbers are depleted, their headquarters has been destroyed, and their base of operations has been conquered.
Redcloak: As an organization, stick a fork in them, they're done.

Panel 5

Redcloak: If we did nothing else here today, at least no more young goblins will have to watch their family be slaughtered by blue-clad humans.
Xykon: Gosh, I'm getting teary just thinking about it!

Panel 6

Xykon: Oh, no, wait, that's just condensation on my undead skull
Xykon: Sending spell for Redcloak: All I care about is the MacGuffin, and ours just blew up. Time to hit the road and find the next one.

Panel 7

Redcloak: I don't think you're looking at this the right way, sir. Yes, we failed to obtain the Gate—
Xykon: Understatement!
Redcloak: —but we've hardly achieved nothing.

Panel 8

Redcloak: Azure City's armed forced are dead or routing. The explosion took out most of their remaining troops. We're in undisputed control right now.
Xykon: So what?? Still no ultra-powerful artifact that we can use to rule the world!

Panel 9

Redcloak: Sir, we almost died up there because we didn't know that the Gate was guarded by a legion of ghost... things.
Redcloak: We need to do some serious research before we head to the next Gate, and I would bet good money that somewhere in this city, someone wrote down how the other Gates are guarded.

Panel 10

View of the fallen Azure City in flames
Redcloak: We can take our time learning what we need, because as of right now, we own this city!

Panel 11

One of the towers falls, "CRASH!"
Xykon: ...
Xykon: I don't suppose we kept the receipt?

D&D Context[]

  • Sending spells allow for long-distance communication, a magical analog to a telephone.

Trivia[]

  • A MacGuffin is a term for a motivating element used to drive the plot but serves no other purpose. They are common in D&D adventures as quest objects.

External Links[]

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